Quote of the Day, 1-22-09

“On the list of things we have to worry about, same-sex marriage is on page six, after ‘Are we eating too much garlic as a people?'” -Lewis Black, The Daily Show, November 7, 2000

Quote of the Day, 12-10-08

“Tom Ridge… is someone who has the leadership qualities of a gerbil. He was a part of coming up with is known as the color coded system of security. You know, orange, and yellow, and what ever the fuck the others are. And what’s stupid about it is they have the color coding. LIKE WE’RE IN FUCKIN’ ELEMENTARY SCHOOL!! There’s no need for that. Because every time they tell us what the color is, then they have to fuckin’ explain it, so get rid of the fuckin’ color! Simplify it. There should be three levels of security: “Jesus Christ,” “God damn it!,” “FUCK ME!”” -Lewis Black, Black on Broadway

Quote of the Day, 12-5-08

“And it’s not the fault of government, okay?  The Republicans and the Democrats can talk about government all they want, ‘Oh, it’s government.  It’s the government.’  And they talk about it as if it’s like a building that’s walking around and doing shit.  Government is human beings.  That’s what the f*** it is.  And the reason government sucks is because none of the human beings have any f***ing common sense.  That’s why!”- Lewis Black, The End of the Universe